If we postulate that a population of intelligent beings, such as the human race, undergoes a maturation process over time which is similar in pattern to the process by which its individual members develop, then humanity of the 1990's may be seen to be in a period corresponding to a person's late teen years. The worst of the adolescent identity crisis, that period when the possibility of suicide increases dramatically, is over and the age of adulthood looms on the near horizon.
Despite the fact that humankind is an intensely visually oriented species, many of us are now beginning to see through the illusory categorical differences which we had created and placed on groups of people, based upon appearance, suspecting or sensing that we are all probably pretty much the same under the surface. We have taken our first halting steps into a new age of enlightened understanding between people, and will probably not allow the leftover remnants of our animal past to bring about our flaming destruction.
The domestication of the process which fuels the stars, known in physics as the fusion reaction, within the next century, will provide us with virtually unlimited, cheap, clean energy. The exploration of space, that final external frontier, will probably soon be taken up again in earnest. We are also well into the pursuit of the final inner frontier, the quest for understanding of the human mind and brain. It is a challenging and exciting, if somewhat turbulent, time in which to live.
Life seems chaotic to us because the values and beliefs underlying the institutions which form the structure of society have been forced into flux by the immense pressures exerted by the exponential growth of science and technology, which, in turn, accelerates the pace of our lives. I suspect future historians may classify this era as a time of transition, when all things became plastic and unstable, in preparation for the coming of a new golden age of peace and prosperity.
Though it has yet to be widely recognized, we are currently in possession of the knowledge and the tools with which to eliminate the majority of the ills of society. The single common denominator of violence, drug addiction, crime, depression, madness, failing relationships, broken homes, and the greed which drives the unequal distribution of wealth, creating hunger and poverty amidst plenty, is the alienation of self and dysfunction of the personality which results from the failure of the socialization process to adapt to the tumultuous changes in the pace and complexity of late twentieth century existence.
All of earth's cultures are experiencing stress from the pressures of change. The rate or degree may differ, but the ultimate effect is the same. Twenty years ago, for instance, it was reported that, in American culture, 96% of all families were dysfunctional. As we have seen, dysfunction breeds dysfunction across the generations, so this process must proceed inexorably forward, like blood past the one-way valves in the veins of our legs. Since there has not been a let up in the pressure, a slowing of the pace, or some external intervention, we must necessarily be approaching a 100% occurrence rate of some form of dysfunction. Crime, divorce, and other indicator statistics, would seem to bear this out. Yet, with a two-front assault, aimed at both, curing existing dysfunction, and simultaneously, at stemming the tide of emotionally dysfunctional and spiritually bankrupt young adults flowing out of our homes, the occurrence of many of our worst problems would, I think, be drastically reduced and possibly eventually eliminated.
Priority must be given to our children, for they are the hope of a better future. It has been shown that children as young as four years readily grasp the fundamental P-A-C concepts. Excellent publications exist, several of which are listed at the end of Appendix B, which teach TA principles to toddler, grade school, and teenage levels. Simple P-A-C training should be given in elementary school, with the addition of script theory in jr. high school. Parents need to be exposed at every opportunity, from prenatal training classes, to church and civic groups, and in PTA meetings and workshops. As early as 1967, Dr. Thomas Harris noted that behavioral education was a must if we hope to have any positive effect upon today's social ills. He states, in I'm OK - You're OK :
"...education about behavior, through an easy-to-understand system like P-A-C could well be the most important thing we could do to solve the problems which beset us and threaten to destroy us. The task involved is almost beyond comprehension; yet, in some way and at some point, we have to make some kind of break in the relentless march of the generations toward insanity and other forms of self-destruction which originate in childhood."(1) |
In his practice, Dr. Harris showed dramatic results in curing juvenile antisocial behavior by teaching P-A-C to both the kids and their parents. This information must not be relegated to the status of a kabbalah – some secret doctrine known only to a select few. It must become common household knowledge. Parenting will always be a challenging and arduous task, but, in this way, it will no longer be a mysterious hit-or-miss process through which we agonize over whether, in light of our own life experiences, we should teach that which our parents taught us, or if not, what information can we trust for this most sacred of all of life's responsibilities? We will have a far better understanding of what is required to give our children the best possible start, and our educators and helping professionals will be able to spot potential problems early. More importantly, they will know how to handle them when they do encounter them. Future generations will reach maturity healthy, balanced, and autonomous; able to forge satisfying long-term relationships and to easily adapt to the changing demands of tomorrow's society.
Another arena requiring attention is the one involving the plight of the millions of our brothers and sisters who currently suffer from the effects of their scripted lives. Futile and harmful outdated philosophies must be replaced with a more enlightened, compassionate, and efficacious approach. An annulment must be brought about in what Steiner calls, "the illegitimate marriage of psychotherapy and clinical medicine."(2) Useless Freudian psychoanalytic techniques can no longer be the basis of the education of persons in the helping professions, and the use of harsh and destructive psychotropic medication regimens, some of which are now known to actually cause destruction of the cells of the brain, must be curtailed.
We cannot afford to let transactional-based therapeutics be just a perk of living in California. This type of assistance should to be available to everyone, regardless of where they live. In addition to practicing these principles in our homes, we must insist that they be adopted by educators, support organizations, and helping professionals in order to get real and effective assistance to those who suffer.
Regarding the enormously serious issues of chemical dependency and corrections, an immediate, radical, and unequivocal change of stance is mandatory at all levels. Addiction is a curable condition and proper training in families will reduce future populations of addicts. Balanced autonomous individuals have no need of chemically assisted coping, and see such things for the ridiculously ineffective substitutes for self-confidence, love, affirmation, and self-esteem, that they are.
It is becoming pretty widely accepted that the so-called "war on drugs" has turned out to be nothing more than an immensely expensive and destructive failure, a misguided travesty, proceeding from a combination of lack of understanding and political kowtowing, in its attempt to legislate away a psychocultural phenomenon that cannot possibly respond to those sorts of measures. In growing numbers around the country, eminently sane, savvy, and educated Americans have been gathering at grass-roots-level meetings to discuss these problems.
When the subject is brought to floor before concerned and enlightened minds, the increasing consensus is that the only real solution is to eradicate the profitable black market, and the only way to do that is to eliminate the demand. Total legalization, along with scientific and government regulation of quality and distribution similar to that for alcohol, is the only sensible first step. This type of policy has been found effective in other countries and is long overdue here. The billions we have been throwing away on enforcement and prisons can then be directed toward improving the psychological health of the population and curing existing addiction. Without a market, the drug merchants are out of business.
Also we must consider the destructive effects of the current thrust of our criminal justice/ correctional systems. Which is the greater evil that can befall a young person, addiction or a criminal record? The answer is obvious, since only addiction is curable. The current practice of permanent public criminal records that follow a person for the rest of his/her life, destroying hope, is an abomination. Even if punishment is deemed necessary to settle a "debt to society," then every effort must be made in an environment of enlightened compassionate assistance, when that debt is paid, to help the individual off to a hopeful restart, providing testing and training and assuring that all the doors of possibility remain open. Any other avenue of approach to these issues is tantamount to cutting off our collective nose to spite the face – the breeding and perpetuation of a permanent criminal population of social outcasts that is self-sustaining and self-replicating across the generations.
Today, 70% or more of the federal prison population is now made up of drug offenders. Our laws recognize and make allowances for certain behaviors, which are precipitated by our genetically-programmed instinct for survival. We also know that the compulsion to use that occurs in addiction runs counter to the survival instinct and is often so irresistible that it overrides this most awesomely powerful of nature's imperatives. Why do we show understanding and forgive an act of survival, yet levy ever more harsh and draconian penalties upon persons who have succumb to an even mightier force, which, without understanding, is impossible to control? I agree wholeheartedly with Thomas Harris when he states that transactional-based rehabilitative programs must become the basis of our correctional system.(1)
On Sunday, July 16, 1995, there appeared an article in the syndicated newspaper magazine section, Parade, by noted actor Carroll O’Connor, in response to painful questions raised by the tragic death of his son, Hugh, after a protracted battle with addiction. Mr. O’Connor asked for a public response to the questions:
Where did we go wrong?
Why did we fail to hear his desperation?
What can be done to eliminate this scourge upon humanity?
I have, from my notes, reconstructed the response which I submitted. It went something like this:
Dear Carroll, My name is Carl, I am a 40-year-old scientist, husband, and father of a 21-month-old baby girl; the miracle of whose being I am only just beginning to appreciate. I am also a drug addict. For the last 15 years, I have struggled and fought for my sanity and the freedom of my soul in a battle so fierce that I've been told that I am lucky to be alive. At this writing, I am sitting in a jail cell because of drugs, completely cut off from my family, and not knowing if I will ever see again my beautiful daughter and the wife that I deeply love. I have just read your poignant and powerful plea for answers to the painful questions racking your soul as a result of the bitter tragedy of the loss of your son to the nightmare of addiction. I am not much of a writer, and I'm struggling for words to express the horror and grief that I share with you when confronted with the knowledge of another beautiful human soul sucked into the maelstrom and the light of the life of a son snuffed out by this madness. My mind recoils at the slightest thought of how I would feel if our little girl were taken permanently from this world and from our lives. It is with a great ironic sadness that I write to tell you that I believe I have discovered, after six long years of intense soul searching and study, the very answers you seek, for they are also my own. I am sorry beyond words that they come too late to save your son. Carroll, as a scientific researcher, I am a trained observer by profession. I am considered quite good at spotting the subtle and minute interrelationships among events and well-versed in the use of abstract reasoning to synthesize a coherent whole from a scattering of parts. Yet it has taken nearly half of my life to come to grips with the totality of this problem, and even now, it may be too late to prevent irreparable harm to my future and that of my young family. I hope that this letter comes to your personal attention, among the many hundreds or thousands that you will receive. I sense the magnitude of your outrage and the depth of your commitment to contribute to a solution to these troubling issues that impinge upon our lives and our loves in such a painful way. I am certain that you could help to bring to fruition some of the hope I have discovered and the healing I envision for this bleeding wound in our society through which is spilling our dearest blood, the lives of our children. It appears to me that the battle will have to be joined on four fronts for a comprehensive solution. These are:
I will address each of these topics briefly, and I direct your attention to the other documents enclosed for additional information that I believe pertinent. I would like to preface these remarks with a few facts about myself and my credibility and right to speak on these issues.
I am the eldest of five children from a middle class American home and Anglo-Irish family ancestry. Neither of my parents are chemically dependent, but my younger brother suffers from an addiction identical to my own. My bachelor's training at the University of Tennessee was in chemistry, and, by the end of my senior year, I'd placed at the top of my class of 1979 – Summa Cum Laude and National Honor Society. I studied medicine for one year, and I completed one year of work toward a Ph.D. in pharmaceutical chemistry at the University of Minnesota. I have three years experience as a surgical assistant, and I worked for one year on the research team at 3M Pharmaceuticals in St. Paul. I contributed to the effort of that group that will shortly bring forth the world's first antiviral drug to the arsenal of modern medicine. Each of these wonderful opportunities for a quality future slipped through my fingers when the ugly head of amphetamine abuse reared itself in my life to snatch away my reason, ruin my health, and poison my spirit. This is a particularly heinous drug and sordid pattern of addiction, akin, but much more powerful than cocaine. Because, unlike alcohol, it is illegal to possess this drug, I am facing the possibility of a fourth drug conviction and the loss of a large chunk of my life. I am not a drug dealer, and all of these charges concern tiny quantities of drug for personal use. By nature, I am a kind, gentle, sensitive, and loving man. I have deep concern for my fellow man, and have not engaged in a criminal lifestyle beyond my illegal addiction. Both my wife and my birth family have become so disillusioned with the cyclic nature of my affliction and inability, to this point, to control it through will alone that they have washed their hands of, and turned their backs to, my plight. They will not even speak to me when I so desperately need the support of my loved ones. This attitude is based in their complete lack of understanding, or desire to understand, the nature of addictive disorder, preferring instead to view it as some sort of innate character flaw or genetic aberration, rather than the learned behavior that it is. What we are dealing with here is a faulty system for coping, rooted in childhood experiences, which can be effectively understood and successfully cured by currently available, but not widely practiced, therapeutic techniques. Enclosed you will find copies of letters written to family members asking for understanding, motions I wrote to the court asking for help, and letters written by others in support of my need for assistance. All of theses pleas have fallen upon deaf ears. No one should have to beg for such help, and to refuse it to someone in need should be unthinkable. The fact that this type of thing is occurring should give us pause to reconsider exactly what our goals really are, regarding the problem of addiction.
To begin, I believe that it is imperative that we decriminalize the possession and use of drugs of addiction immediately and make them available to users in a chemically pure and sanitary form within the controlled surroundings of hospitals or centers specially created for this purpose. This must be done to stop the loss of life from infectious disease, such as HIV and Hepatitis, and to begin to remove addiction from the gutters and crack houses to a more proper and helping environment. Detoxification and referral to programs designed to cure the underlying cause of the problem, rather than just "arrest" the symptoms, is a natural offshoot of this emergency first-aid type of measure. Since all drugs of abuse are exceedingly inexpensive to produce, the cost would be comparatively low which would, in turn, have an enormous impact upon the profitability of black market drugs. I understand that this approach has been used successfully in parts of Europe for some years now. By far the most important mandate is the reeducation of people, at all levels of our society, as to the nature and cause of addictive disorder. When it is finally seen that we, the parents and family of the addict, help shape the development of the addict's life script within our own homes, the shame and stigma may be reduced and a more enlightened climate created – one of understanding and compassion and one which is almost certainly going to be required if we hope eradicate this scourge from the population in the foreseeable future. Dr. Stanton Peele , in his book on love and addiction, spends the initial segment discussing the sickness of the American concept of the skid-row alcoholic or the wasted, useless, and perhaps evil drug addict. He says that, in England, the prevailing view is different and that most addicts hold down jobs and have families. Peale further suggests that we have created a self-fulfilling prophesy for our pariah class of untouchables.(3) Virginia Satir, in her lovely book on parenting, Peoplemaking , states, after interviewing 3000 families and 10,000 individuals in her role as a renowned family therapist, that 96% of American families are dysfunctional in some way.(4) This is to say that most of us are coming into adulthood without the proper skills to deal with life correctly. In support of this conclusion, the University of Minnesota recently developed a test for fitness for marriage and found that 80% of marriages are entered into by persons without an understanding of how to achieve a successful relationship, and are therefore doomed to failure from the outset. The most prevalent ideas on addiction are the ones espoused by modern psychiatry, which believes all emotional disorders to be incurable. The therapist's role has been described as helping these "poor twisted souls" to scratch out a minimal existence, living wretched limited lives while preserved on oppressive drugs and weekly sessions. The idea of the "incurable disease" is at the root of both, the infamous Minnesota Model of Chemical Dependency and the 12-Step type recovery programs, and these constitute the antiquated (12-stepping is at least 50 years old) basis of the majority of the "treatment" currently available in this country. While some people have managed to survive, the results are far from hopeful. Most people, professionals included, are surprised to learn that this disease concept was shown to be invalid over twenty years ago, when the true nature of the affliction was elucidated and the cure made possible through application of a type of psychotherapy known as Transactional Analysis, or TA for short. This work was pioneered by the late Dr. Eric Berne, author of Games People Play .(5) Dr. Berne died in 1970 before he could fully develop the far-reaching ramifications of his innovative theories. Berne's student, Dr. Claude Steiner, built upon Berne's earlier work to bring the ideas full circle and to an elegant closure in his stunning masterwork, Scripts People Live.(2) This book began the process which has provided not a "chalkboard solution," but a powerful strategy that has proven effective in the trenches of the emotionally disturbed. In an extreme over simplification, I paraphrase the fundamental precepts of TA as being that all human being are born perfect in their capacity for the human faculties of intimacy, awareness, and spontaneity; trusting, loving, and lovable in their innocence – that we are all princes and princesses, until our parents, mostly inadvertently and unintentionally, turn us into frogs. Harmful messages, called injunctions, attributions, and drivers are internalized by young minds that lead to varying degrees of dysfunctional behavior patterns, called scripts, which compromise the quality of later life. The injunctions are not always verbal, and rarely are intended to harm, but, from the perspective of a very young child, they may be perceived quite differently from the way they were intended. A simple and relatively minor example would be that of a tired parent saying, "Don't run and make noise in the house!" This can be internalized by the youngster as "don't be happy or spontaneous." A parent whose own needs are met would delight in such antics rather than issue harsh and oppressive demands. Psychological absence, emotional distancing, and the use of self-esteem destroying attributions of evilness, sinfulness, or inadequacy can have dire long-term effects upon the emotional health of the child.
Carroll, you asked, "Where did we go wrong?" and "why did we not hear?". If you truly want to know and aren't afraid of the answers, take a day or two to read this remarkable book. It proposes a very compelling explanation for such things. I think it may well be the most important work that I have ever encountered in all of my search for understanding. Dr. Steiner shows that the three basic reasons that people seek psychotherapy, depression, madness (schizophrenia), and chemical dependency, are none of them diseases by any accepted scientific definition of a disease, but rather, are learned behavioral patterns, or scripts, that he calls the no love, no mind, or no joy patterns respectively. I would like to make it clear that neither I, nor those practicing Transactional Analysis, are attempting to affix anything like blame. Please do not use this information for the brutal atrocity of self-flagellation. Blame, guilt, shame, and worry are useless concepts that waste immense amounts of creative mental energy and interfere with problem solving. I hold my own parents guileless and blameless and also myself. I only say, "Hey, we all had a hand in my getting this way. How about helping me in my fight to get back my membership in the human race? I am willing to do my part." For those who cannot see beyond blame, let them place it upon the industrial revolution that brought with it this exponential growth in the complexity of life. The relentless increase in the number of decisions a person must face in a lifetime has crowded out the quality time needed for personal discovery and for the formulation of effective coping and parenting skills, pushing these qualities to the verge of extinction and leaving at least two generations of parents bewildered and confused. Fear, anger, and confusion seem to be the most commonly experienced feelings these days. We have lost touch with the simple process of affirmation of existence and unconditional love that children need as much as they need food in order to grow into a full and balanced humanity, facing life with courage and confidence in their abilities to understand their world and to successfully give and receive nurturing love. It is small wonder our homes have become emotionally toxic and spiritually bereft. For a splendid short course on these simple and beautiful ideas with which we seem to be out of touch, let me recommend to the reader: Self-esteem: A Family Affair - Jeane Illsley Clarke(6) How to Really Love Your Child - Ross Campbell MD.(7) Peoplemaking - Virginia Satir(4) Raising Kids Ok - Terry Keepers / Dorothy Babcock(8) I regret that I cannot, in good conscience, agree with the draconian legislative proposals you put forth to deal with this problem. We have already surrendered too many of our cherished constitutional freedoms to this cause. The drug laws must be reformed immediately; The hue and cry must go out loud and clear. We cannot keep jailing and punishing our young people for engaging in behavior that we helped them develop, and of which, they have little of the understanding necessary for effective control. With adequate nurturing, the human organism will naturally seek that which is best for it. Too many lives and careers (among them mine) have been ruined through the double damnation of chemical dependency and permanent public criminal records. We must not keep feeding our most precious resource to the voracious and ignorant lumbering juggernaut that is this country's misguided criminal justice system. Some changes that are needed include:
In order to reclaim this lost resource, we must spend our money on educating the public and providing high quality professional therapy for the addict rather than throwing it away in the escalating insanity of more police and more prisons. Barbarism is not the answer to anything.
Eventually, as the logical continuation of the above process, we must completely reform our ideas of crime and punishment and our antiquated correctional system. You may be aware that, some years back, studies quoted as showing that rehabilitation did not work were used as the basis for going to an all-punishment philosophy of corrections. These were erroneous conclusions resulting because effective forms of therapy were not in use to treat such problems at that time, because of the oppressive nature of correctional environments, and because of the twisted, sadistic, and brutal misfits that are attracted to the low-paying jobs in such hopeless places. Even the health care staff in prisons are often the dregs of their respective professions, many because, for one reason or another, they could not make it or are no longer allowed to practice in the private sector. Prisons provide large populations of people in cages, out of the public eye and out of the public conscience, upon which such people often find an outlet for venting their bitter frustrations. If we would commit the resources to hire the upper echelons of these professions instead, we could go to an incentive-based system, whereby offenders would be released when they can demonstrate to a panel of skilled and compassionate therapists that they have given up their scripts and are ready for redecision and relearning of more effective coping skills. The fundamental issue here is that it is time for a change of stance and outmoded philosophies must be replaced in order to achieve our goals. The disease concept and the oppressive drug laws were a first approximation at the solution. My proposals constitute a second approximation. The theory of limits from mathematics shows us that the unknown truth is approached by a series of successive approximations. Eventually it will become clear to all that every form of antisocial behavior results from a curable emotional disturbance. Then we will see that all criminals may be reformed and rehabilitated with the correct approach, and the prisons may then be closed for good. What will we do with all the empty space? I don't know. Perhaps, we could convert them to learning centers for personal growth between now and the dawn of the renaissance of the human spirit which some predict. What do you think? Please realize that I hastily put this letter together because I did not know how much time I had. I did not see your article until a week after it was published. My poor words leave much unsaid so please, accept my challenge to read some of the elegant and beautiful words of hope in the books that I mentioned. I know very little of current media personalities because so much of my recent history has found me engaged in a pitched battle for survival and left me with little time for the simple pleasures of family entertainment. However, I do have a vivid memory from years ago of watching the late Sammy Davis Jr. on the old Tonight Show. I recall him commenting upon the incongruity between the ranting bigot that you were portraying on television at that time and the warm and genuine human being that was the man Carroll O'Connor. The honesty of the expression of your pain, and of your call for help in understanding it, bears Mr. Davis' compliments out admirably. Carroll, when we have removed that spiritual and emotional void from our troubled hearts, the drug experience will be seen for what it truly is, a toxic and farcically artificial and ineffective substitute for the love and life affirmation which drugs are employed to replace. Until then we must remember to Teach Only Love, for not only is it the quintessence of what we are, but it is also a most effective vehicle for change.
Hope, love, and encouragement Carl |
Mr. O’Connor has promised to help bring the responses that he received to public forum and debate when and wherever he was able. I do not know what effect my letter, among the many sent in, may have had, but I remain hopeful. I will continue not only to maintain hope but also to act. This book is step number one for me. If its message reaches others who care enough to dare to make a difference, then I have succeeded in making a start. If there is a call for it, I will write a second, outlining the results of the plan I have formulated here.
In addition, I intend to hold forth, at every opportunity, to bring this message to children and parents, wherever anyone will listen. Now that I am free of this awful curse, I will do everything within my power to help insure a better tomorrow for my family, my community, and our world.
With these words now made public, they have become the standard against which I will be measured in all of my future actions. I must succeed, for if I fail, this noble effort is reduced to what I once heard described as "the ultimate absurd buffoonery of a man sitting amidst the ruins of his world, daubing himself with his own excrement."
I will not leave such a legacy.
Dawntreader
3 p.m. February 19, 1996
Mason, TN
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